Currently Playing Franz Ferdinand By Franz Ferdinand see related

So I’m in some sort of room and Jake, Toby, and I are all standing around.  Jake says that our base has been infiltrated and something very valuable to us has been stolen and Toby and I have to get it back.  We were the security I guess. So we hop into our golf cart and head out into what looks like a movie production studio.  We are outside surrounded by huge buildings with Mediterranean styled walls, and we see the 2 culprits running and jump into their own golf carts.  I recognize them as Vicky and Harley.

            I step onto the accelerator of the golf cart and shout “After them!” or something.  They are probably drunk or something and their golf cart weaves around for a few minutes before toppling over next to one of the huge buildings.  They jump out and start to run.  Since Toby and I are still in a golf cart, we drive up, jump out and try to apprehend them.  I go for Vicky and Toby goes for Harley.  I grab Vicky’s arm and she says “No! ah!”  I slam her against the building, using my fore-arm to pin her against the wall.   I pat her down and take my S&W m945 combat from the back of her waistband.

            Toby is still fighting with Harley and I rush over to help them, but Harley pulls a gun and starts shooting.  Toby jumps into the air and somehow Vicky gets shot in the chest and crumples like a wet rag. I shout “Medic!” at the top of my lungs and begin to chase down Harley.  I pull out the S&W and it takes a tremendous effort to pull back the slide and cock it, like a real gun.  For some reason I shout, “Halt!” before I open up.  I seem to have really bad aim and can’t hit her, but she screams every time I shoot.  While I was standing shooting she has entered one of the buildings, and there is a long dark corridor ahead of us.  I run into a passage on my right, ducking bullets fired from Harley.  I pop out from time to time and shoot at her, but this time I can see huge bb’s bouncing off from her back with each hit. 

            She exits the corridor and I begin to pursue her.  Suddenly we are in this huge playpen.  There are giant toy cars scattered everywhere.  There is maybe a 300 foot distance between me and any of the vehicles.  Harley has already stolen a swamp rider, one with the huge fans on the back that skim the water.  She is quickly gaining distance and I’m running as fast as I can to one of the vehicles.  I look around and see a Hummer convertible, and jump in that.  I floor it and smash into a series of other vehicles before I see something.

            There is a kid playing with a very elaborate setup of a medieval battle, with a mountain range running between his 2 armies.  I sense that Harley is hiding in the mountains, and I have to destroy it to get her out.  I power slide my Hummer into the mountain and level it.  Harley screams and has turned into a very small white doll, maybe 6 inches high.  I feel a great sense of victory.  An adequately sized small train suddenly comes along the tracks she is on, and hits her, blowing her body into hundreds of little pieces.  Again I feel victorious, and suddenly all the little pieces from the kid’s medieval battle and Harley’s corpse and the destroyed mountain turn into little LEGO pieces.

            I open my arms wide and scoop them all into one pile.  The kid is like, “What the fuck you ruined my shit!”  I told him it was important and continue to search through the giant pile.  I say, “hey help me this is important.”  He says “only for 200 dollars.” And I tell him to fuck off.  I find something, it’s a little cane for a LEGO man, maybe ¾ an inch tall.  It’s crooked. 

I look up and Jake is standing there and I say, “look I’ve found it, I think.”  I put it into Jake’s hand and he says, “Great work James, you’ve recovered Gandalf’s wizard staff!”  Then I woke up.

Wow I had a crazy dream while I was napping today

First there is a man with evil intentions who has the holy grail.  I’m unable to see his face.  He walks up to the top level of his castle and it’s a large rectangular flat area, and there is a massive black swirling mist.  He calls out to the mist, “Come, I have something you want, if you will help me you may have my shiny.”

            Suddenly I’ve come out of a cave and I’m running towards helms deep.  It must be over a mile away, there is just a vast flat black plain.  Zombies are everywhere, I’m dodging them left and right and running with Ara, weaving through the crowd.

            Running alongside me, Ara opens his mouth, “Here James take this!”  He throws me a little bottle that looks like it would be used to dispense ketchup.  I immediately drop it and shout “Fuck!!” and a group of zombies move over the area where I dropped it.  By this time I’m pretty close to Helms deep so I just run in.  The whole time I’ve been running through the field, I’ve been knocking arrows into my bow at indiscriminate times and firing them off into the sky so they will rain down on the head of a zombie and splatter it open.

            I’m looking around and it seems to have gotten somewhat smaller than the movie.  I run to the back looking for arrows but all I can find are bolts, which are worthless because nobody has a crossbow.  I pick up a few bolts and examine them but put them back on the ground where I found them.  I went and began to climb a ladder, and when I get to the top there isn’t a place to stand, but there are many razor sharp darts around where the stone from the mountain meets the fortress.  I say, “Hey Jake you know how to use these right?”  He replies that he does and I began tossing them down to him.

            After a while I noticed things had begun to become very quiet.  I turned around and there inner area of Helms Deep was filled with zombies, packed like a mosh pit.

            “What the fuck are you guys doing, who the fuck forgot to lock the gate?! What the fuck we’re going to die now AAHH!!!!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.  The gate slammed down and smashed 3 or 4 zombies caught under the huge slab of metal.  I blinked and suddenly there was a troll flailing about and fighting in the middle of the zombies.  Brian McCarter, Jake Scott, and some other large football people / Orcs stood up what appeared to be a chain link fence and began to push the horde of zombies toward the now closed gate.  They kept pushing and pushing until the zombies couldn’t be compacted anymore, at which point they exploded.

            The walls of the mountain and of Helms Deep rocked as blood and gore splattered everywhere.  The whole earth began to shake and some of the zombies close to the outside of Helms Deep exploded too.  All the ones inside were crushed.  Jake Scott put his massive arms up against the walls inside helms deep and began to rock the earth again.  The zombies put their hands up to their faces and began to scream as they exploded, the closest ones exploding the fastest.  The day was saved.